Near And Deer
If you know me personally, you know I am a pray-er and a watcher. I believe strongly in the power of prayer and I watch to see where God is active and working. If you know me as an artist, you know that I try and convey a story in my work. I want there to be meaning behind what I create. If you don't know me at all, you're about to learn a little bit.
Backing up several years, I was miserable in what I was doing and felt completely stifled and craved an outlet for my creativity. I began to pray and ask God, “Surely this can’t be all You have for me, can it?” I felt over and over and over the words come to me, “be aware.” I did not know what that meant, but just started to notice that each day when I would pray that, I would see a cardinal (red bird). I have many stories about how I saw the birds and how I knew each encounter was no mere coincidence. It was what I refer to as a “God whisper.” In fact, it was not too long until God opened the door for our business, The Red Door Gallery. Guess where the name came from?
Then, back up just a few years, I was really having some personal struggles and even battling some anxiety and depression. I was talking with a friend, and she suggested I ask God for something specific as a God whisper. So, not being a stranger to this idea, I specifically asked God for feathers. Not really as a sign of Him, because that’s where faith comes in. But just a sense of His presence and to give me peace in knowing He had me and my situation in His grasp. You would not believe the stories of where I saw feathers! As an example, on one particular morning I was feeling down and walked out the backdoor and one floated down right in front of my face. It stopped me in my tracks as I watched it drift all the way to the ground and land at my feet. Coincidence? I think not.
In August of this year, I lost my very dear and beloved brother. It has devastated me beyond what I am able to express on some days. I have never experienced loss of this magnitude. As I cried out to God in the following few days, I told God I desperately needed some God whispers to get through this. Several days in a row we had to drive down to my parent’s home and I would find myself just staring out the window, still feeling some shock and usually always teary-eyed. Jeff had taken several days off and did the driving, while I just did the staring and the crying. On each drive, we saw deer standing just on the side of the interstate. They seemed to be peering straight at me. My heart leapt as I knew this was God’s whisper to me. I was assured that He saw me; He saw my hurt and my grief; He saw my pain and my tears; He saw me and He cared.
So when it came time to paint our Christmas Card for this year, I was a bit stumped about what to paint. The cardinal has such special meaning for me and I painted that last year, so I knew it had to be something else. So, I just started with the evergreens and snow in the background, and then all of a sudden it came to me, and this is the result. I entitled it “Near and Deer” because I will always hold Andy close in my heart and I know that God is with me (Near). And the deer part is obvious, but it’s also dear to me how He has spoken to me greatly during these last few months.
Now I realize for many, this may all sound hokey and far-fetched and like a grieving sister who has lost her mind, but I know our God speaks to us through His Word, other people, and nature. He has loved me through many a day with something as simple, but yet so profound as a “God whisper.” I expect many more whispers as I work my way through this great loss in my life, maybe even for the rest of my life. But with each whisper, I know and I believe that God is giving me His love, His grace, and His mercy.
I’d love to hear stories of how He’s whispered to you. Please leave your response here and I promise to read each and every word. If you would like to receive a copy of our Christmas Card, I would be happy to mail one to you as a reminder of God’s love for you. Please leave me your address and one will be on it’s way to you. Merry Christmas blessings to you and yours.
12 Comments
Dec 13, 2022, 12:41:47 PM
Vickie Bolduc - Thank you Jan! Merry Christmas!
Dec 10, 2022, 12:00:57 PM
Jan stansberry - Your work is always beautiful
Dec 9, 2022, 10:10:20 AM
Vickie Bolduc - Thank you dear precious friends. We (I) couldn't have made it through without your support, prayers, and love. I can never truly put into accurate words what you all me to me, to Jeff and I both. You all are a God whisper at each encounter with you and we cherish your friendship and your love.
Dec 9, 2022, 10:07:58 AM
Vickie Bolduc - Thank you so much, Marie. That means so much to me, coming from such a gifted and talented artist as yourself. He told us to spread the good news, and if that's through our work and our words, I'll do it every chance I get. And as you said, it is so incredible when we open our ears to hear Him, we will. When we open our eyes to see Him, we will. When we open our hearts to His love, He will fill it to overflowing. Merry Christmas blessings to you and Paul and your family.
Dec 9, 2022, 10:03:55 AM
Vickie Bolduc - Thank you so much for your kind words, dear life-long friend! I think back so fondly on our years together as friends and am so grateful. I remember when both of our brothers were born. We were in 4th grade and we had something no one else in our class did...a real live baby doll.
I was heartbroken when you lost both of your precious parents. I loved them dearly.
So many prayers were lifted for you precious Hunter, and boy did God ever answer! He is so faithful and so good and He loves us so! I'm thankful for that God whisper He sent to you in that hospital. Sometimes we just don't know how our actions can impact others. All it requires is a little obedience and action and sincerity. I love you dear friend and pray you have a VERY blessed and Merry Christmas!!
Dec 8, 2022, 9:38:09 PM
Bob and Beth - Vickie, This is so good and inspiring. The way you express your feelings and how God is working in it all is a blessing. It’s true that He hears every cry and bottles every tear. The painting is so breathtakingly beautiful and exudes peace, which we all need. We’re all in about the deer and the feathers and how God uses these things as His whispers to us. Thanks for sharing this as only you could. We love you!
Dec 8, 2022, 11:51:07 AM
Marie Merritt - Vicki, your prose is as beautiful and heartfelt as your art. Thank you for sharing your talents in both with us, yet more importantly thank you for sharing your faith in God and how he hears! He promises to never leave nor forsake us. Whether it is a feather, a dear,, a blade of grass that glistens with the morning dew, or the sounds of silence in a chaotic world, he shows those who have eyes to see and ears to hear, our creator shows his love for us. May our God of hope, fill you, Jeff and all of your family with all joy and peace this holiday season.
Dec 8, 2022, 10:33:03 AM
Missy vincent - As I read your heart touching words and I understand your , although I haven’t lost my bother, “the you Jesus”, I have lost both of my parents. When Hunter had his AVM ruptured curt and I were scared, that an understatement. Covid head just hit hard and where we normally have each other to hold on too God showed us just how powerful he really is. We couldn’t be together with the Drs, Hunter had 7, telling us asking us so many things were going on. One evening Hunter wasn’t doing very well he started, what looked like a seizure, all I could do was pray I dropped too my knees begging, to my God please don’t take my baby and out of all the Drs nurses this lady came from the hallway, I had never seen her before and we had been at Vanderbilt for 7 days. This lady came and got down on her knees with me a started praying and telling me God is good and he will take care of my baby I opened my tested filled eyes. She hugs me. She had no idea just how bad I needed that hug and her words. I know you are thinking what I thought she’s an angle although she was a real lady, she was an angle to me. Thank you for sharing your beautiful stories. I love you and miss you my precious friend. I love love a card here is my address. 2510 Highway 11, Sweetwater, TN 37874
Dec 7, 2022, 10:20:13 PM
Vickie Bolduc - Thank you, Amy. I really appreciate your kindness and sweet words about Andy. When he was having all of his major health problems, I remember you messaging or posting, asking about him and how he was doing. That meant a great deal to me. Your card will be on its way soon. Merry Christmas!
Dec 7, 2022, 10:17:58 PM
Vickie Bolduc - My word, sister, you have been through it the last few years. Even with all that so many would turn their backs on God, but like you said, He is so faithful even through it all. He loves us so much. Stress and grief take such tolls on our bodies, but it gives me great comfort knowing He shares in our grief and collects our tears. I've learned that crying is ok, even when it might not be deemed appropriate by others. Sending you and John much love and prayers. A card will be on it's way soon!
Dec 7, 2022, 8:50:18 PM
Louise Barnes - This is what happens when you listen to the God-whispers!! My story began with our retirement move from Sweetwater to Florida in 2019. Looking forward to not working for the first time since I was 13 , our first few months in the Florida gulf was perfect! Then 3 months later I had a kidney stone. A few months after that John had urinary problems and was getting treatment when Covid19 hit. From March until October, he was not treated because of Covid. In October my son-in-law died from colon cancer at 45. In December John had prostate cancer surgery. For the next 2 years I walked with a cane. In 2021 John had additional surgery. On New Year’s Eve, we received the devastating message that his 54 year old son died in n his sleep. In March 2022 John was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes. Through it all, God has been so faithful! He has carried us when we couldn’t carry each other. I would love your card! 10306 Highland Park Place Palmetto Florida 34221 I’ve lost 2 brothers. It’s really hard. Rankin was 43. Marvin was 67. I still grieve.
Dec 7, 2022, 8:17:12 PM
Amy Richeson Maynor - Beautiful! Thanks for sharing. I thought the world of Andy. He always had a radiant smile! Clyde & Willie thought he hung the moon, I do believe. By the way, they’re holding him in their arms once again. ❤️ I would love a card from you & Jeff! 161 County Rd 519 Englewood Tn 37329